Just a few things

J. Lo-You've passed the point of no return. You're preggers, and I heard with twins-please be the cool person we all know you are and admit it and let us into your joyous news.

Sony Ericsson cell phone-You are supposed to be way smarter than that and register the time change. Why was I awake at 8am today? I blame you.

Perez-You made no postings yesterday until very late at night. That is disappointing as my favorite thing about getting off of work on a Saturday morning is coming home to catch up on gossip. Please don't ever do that again.

16 year old girls-Stop trying to grow up too fast; you'll regret it. Also, please wear clothes that fit, are appropriate, and aren't sold to strippers on a regular basis.

The man-Damn you.

The Radio-too early for Christmas music. Please try again after Thanksgiving.

Kwik Trip-$2.19 for a redbull? Seriously? Pretty soon it'll be more than a gallon of gas for the small can...what will I do then?

Allstate-You're really starting to piss me off. You call this customer service?

G+G Chvojicek-Seriously? You're not going to phone me back? It's been four months...I will definitely win this battle.

Britney-Knock it off! Get back to your fantastic self! And do it yesterday!

Time Warner-You're very expensive. Please lower your prices.

Halle Berry-We know you're hot-but you have never rubbed it in our faces before you were pregnant. Oh, and you can't go from Type 1 to Type 2 Diabetes, so I'll give you a do-over on that statement.

Postsecret.com-I adore you. Please make new postings more than once a week. Pretty please.

Deucetree-Please don't make Tianna waitress.

San Diego-Cease fire.

Limewire-Thank you for working this morning!

To all my friends and family-You're the best!